"Paul is Undead" by Alan Goldsher

"Paul is Undead"
by Alan Goldsher
read by Simon Vance
published by Blackstone Audio (2010)
Approx 8 hours

As the kids say, "OMG," I am still giggling thinking about this book and I finished it 2 days ago. "Paul is Undead" has got to be one of the funniest books I've read in a long time. This book is written in the format of the many biographies of rock stars in that it is a series of interviews that tell the story. This time though the story is not the story we all know as the rise of The Beatles to the "Toppermost of the Poppermost," a phrase used by John Lennon throughout the book and the definition is not fully understood until the very end.

In the tradition of all the horror mashups that have been released recently, (e. g. "Pride and Prejudice and Zombies," and "Sense and Sensibility and Seamonsters," and "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter") Alan Goldsher gives it a go, mashing up the supernatural and the Beatles. The entire history of The Beatles is retold with The Beatles now being Zombies and wanting to take over the world. Okay, really only 3 of the Beatles are zombies, Ringo is a 7th level Ninja, of course.

When you rush out to get this book, I would HIGHLY recommend getting the audiobook version. Simon Vance does a superb job of not just reading the book but performing it as well. Vance does his best impression of all celebrities mentioned in the book including the Fab 4, but with more, he does the voice of the Chicago reporter who is writing the book, Mick Jagger, Ed Sullivan, Elvis, Rod Argent, Yoko Ono, Bob Dylan, Roy Orbison, Satan and more. At times I felt as though I were listening to an audio biography produced by Ken Burns (but without the long drawn out scenes.) Vance had me laughing out loud with my headphones on with his presentation of this already hilarious book.

The book opens with Howard Cosell breaking in and announcing the attempted beheading of John Lennon by Mark David Chapman. Lennon's head is reattached and Chapman is arrested. From there we go back to the birth of John Lennon when as he came out of the womb he was zombified via the "Liverpool Process." The "Liverpool Process" of creating zombies is different from many other zombie creations known around the world. The "Liverpool Process" produces a super human zombie that can think, has supernatural powers, great speed, can hypnotize anyone, and can tear off and reattach any limb and more. Oh they still hunger for the gray matter but they can also eat , drink and experiment with drugs, the brain eating is saved for special occasions.

John then recruits/turns Paul and the duo are unstoppable, George Harrison is turned by Paul because John thinks he is too young. Stu Sutcliffe doesn't get turned to a zombie instead after quitting the Beatles he becomes a vampire. After the three play a few gigs they realize they need to replace Pete Best because they need a drummer who can protect the band. Enter Ringo Starr, a 7th level ninja, who can turn himself invisible (great subtle joke there).

Sure they have their problems, after all the world doesn't quite know what to do with zombies, but they make great music. Even worse, world renowned zombie hunter, Mick Jagger, is always trying to destroy them. Rod Argent is accused of riding the Beatles' coattails by naming his band The Zombies, even though they aren't undead. Roy Orbison is a deity of unknown proportion who doesn't allow Paul to steal his glasses. Smoking marijuana creates zombie flatulence which creates a purple haze of a more potent material that takes Bob Dylan by surprise. The Mahareshi Yogi gets dismembered, and finally Yoko Ono a 9th level ninja, has it out for Ringo.

All the stories are there, from their first Ed Sullivan appearance, the Shea Stadium troubles, and the band playing a concert on the rooftop of Abbey Road Studios, but with the hilarious zombie twist. For any Beatles fan this book is a must, it will have you laughing throughout.
Lots of gory laughs to be had.

"The Dresden Files: Welcome to the Jungle" Graphic Novel by Jim Butcher

"The Dresden Files: Welcome to the Jungle"
Graphic Novel
by Jim Butcher
Illustrated by Ardian Syaf
Published by Del Rey (2008)

Jim Butcher confesses in the preface to this collected edition, that when he writes a Harry Dresden story he pictures the action in comic book form and I found it interesting that as I read each new novel my mind immediately interprets into a comic book /animation format. Jim says it's because he collected Marvel comics for a large part of his life, maybe that's my reason also. I find it amazing that he and I shared the same passion, if only I had turned that passion into great writing like he did.

Anyway, these stories were originally published in comic book form in four issues. This edition collects those comics into one graphic novel and includes a section with extra artwork representing the covers and character development sketches. Reading this story in comic book form allows the reader to enjoy the action with some great artwork.

This story is a prequel to the Dresden files taking place just before the first book , "Storm Front." A side note here "Storm Front" has since been adapted to graphic novel form.

After a security guard at the Lincoln Park Zoo is found dead at the zoo, the police immediately think that a gorilla named Moe is to blame. Special Investigations Lt. Karrin Murphy, doesn't think it fits that the gorilla escaped, killed the guard and locked himself back in the cage. So she calls in the only guy capable of handling the world of the weird, Chicago's own wizard, Harry Dresden. Harry has to find what actually happened and present it to Murphy so the officials can somewhat swallow the story. Harry is soon attacked by several jungle cats, a black dog and a hag. With some help from Bob the skull, Harry finds out what is killing but now he has to figure out how to stop them or more than just the zoo will be in trouble.

With excellent Jim Butcher storytelling and beautiful artwork "Welcome to the Jungle" is a great introduction to the Dresden files series.

"Immortalis - Part 3 of 3" Book 7(of 7) of "The Demon Wars Saga" by R.A. Salvatore

"Immortalis - Part 3 of 3"
Book 7(of 7) of "The Demon Wars Saga"
by R.A. Salvatore
Multicast Performance
Produced by GraphicAudio
Approx 6 hours.


It is a bittersweet thing to come to an end of any good saga; When I finished the "Lord of the Rings" trilogy by J.R.R. Tolkien I was happy to come to an ending of an adventure but saddened that I was no longer hanging out with my hobbit friends. When Jim Butcher finished his "Codex Alera" series It was cool to see how it all ended but again, sad that I was no longer hanging out with the fury masters. The same goes for "The Demon Wars Saga," by R.A. Salvatore. Through seven books in the series, the adventures in the land of Corona, between the countries of Honce-the-Bear and Behren and all the surrounding areas, The Demon Dactyl, Bestesbulzibar, awoke, tainted the land of the elves, was destroyed, possessed the leader of the Abellican church, was defeated, and then possessed the body of a baby that became king. It took 7 books to get through the adventure but was it ever worth it.

I was introduced to this adventure through the excellent production of audiobooks from GraphicAudio. GraphicAudio's slogan is "A Movie in Your Mind" and do they ever deliver. Every audiobook I've heard from GraphicAudio is phenomenal with excellent voice acting, super realistic sound effects and incidental music that moves you through the story while reflecting the emotion or action of the moment.

The cast of actors not only bring the story to life through their craft of acting, but when an interesting accent is needed they deliver. For example, what accent would you use for an Alpinadoran mountain man? an elf from the Touel'alfar or Doc'alfar? an Abellican Monk were-tiger? There's not really any manual for this but the cast in GraphicAudio's production of this series may have created one.

The special effects also push this story along with superb fluency. The effects are just as difficult to create here, after all what is the sound of an elven arrow piercing the eye of a giant? what does a centaur sound like while running. None of the effects were stock, or at least were produced to be original to the story. Once again the movie in your mind is a reality through all these production elements. When it comes to audiobooks GraphicAudio will put you in the story and you'll never want to leave.

One final aspect of the GraphicAudio production of this saga, is that they split up the seven books to where they averaged three 6 hour parts per book. This made the saga easier to digest in smaller lumps, although I'm looking at purchasing the entire series as a boxed set package for a gift for a friend

Here's how the final book plays out:

Self-proclaimed King of Honce-the-Bear, Adryan, son of Elbryan the Ranger and Jilseponie the warrior/ranger/former Queen, has been sweeping the land conquering those that oppose his rule. Adryan's expertise at the magick of the gemstones of the Abellican church also puts him on to the path to destroying the church and placing the evil Marcalo De'Unnaro as leader of the church. De'Unnaro is the one responsible for killing Adryan's father.

To the South of Honce-the-Bear, in the land of Behren, another Ranger has just won freedom for her people, the To'gai from years of slavery by the Behrenese. The Behrenese church was destroyed in the process. Adryan decides to use that turmoil to conquer Behren. When his plans include conquering To'Gai, the ranger Brin Dahryelle, decides to join the battle defeating Adryan.

So now the peoples up against Adryan include, his mother, another expert of the gemstone magicks, Brin and her Dragon, Agradeleus, the elves of the Touel'alfar and Doc'alfar, the mountain men of Alpinador and their ranger, and Prince Midalis, the rightful heir to the throne of Honce-the-Bear and his army.

The battles all lead to the Abellican Church at the center of it all St. Mere Abell. The battle ensues and Adryan ressurects his father to join with him against his mother. The dragon, Agradeleus, recognizes the Demon Dactyl possessing Adryan's body and alerts the others. This could either mean the way to defeat Adryan or the hopelesness of the battle. How the warriors look at it will change the outcome.

The final battle and the epilogue to the story bring about a great close to the series with a bit of an opening in which R.A. Salvatore could write some more stories with some of the main characters. A great adventure comes to a close but in a way that leaves the reader/listener wanting more yet happy if that is the end.

"Eldest" Inheritance, Book Two by Christopher Paolini

"Eldest"
Inheritance, Book Two
by Christopher Paolini
Published 2005 by Knopf Books for Young Readers

Christopher Paolini continues to amaze me. After reading "Eragon," the first book in what is book one of the Inheritance series (three books have been written and it is rumored there is a fourth book on the way.), I was totally sucked in to the fantasy world where dragons, elves, dwarves and magicians exist and an evil king has tried to destroy all Dragon Riders. Now with book two I just couldn't hardly put the book down. When finishing the first book I looked up information on the author and found out the book was written when he was only 15 years old. An amazing feat in and of itself, but to be able to create this fantasy world with many depths that's a serious job for any author,no matter what the age. This second book was published when the author was in his early 20s so now that he's got his style and his world created the books can only get better, as this one does.

In book one, "Eragon," the reader was taken on a quest in which Eragon and his Dragon, Saphira, learned of the reason behind their bonding and the development of their skills as Eragon sought revenge on the Ra'zac for the killing of his uncle. He eventually was taken to the Varden, both to save Arya (the elf that sent the dragon's egg to Eragon, and to escape King Galbatorix's wrath. Along the way Eragon learns his travelling companion, Brom, is a former rider. They also are rescued at one point by Murtagh who joins them on their trip to the Varden, although he says he cannot complet they journey to Farthen Dûr, the home of the Varden. When they arrive in Farthen Dûr, Eragon is led to the leader of the Varden, Ajihad. Ajihad imprisons Murtagh after finding out that he is the son of Morzan, Galbatorix's right hand man.

"Eldest" begins three days after the events of the preceding novel, "Eragon," in the dwarf city of Tronjheim, inside of a hollowed mountain of Farthen Dûr. Farthen Dûr is in the southeastern part of Alagaësia, the continent in Paolini's world where all this action takes place. Eragon must complete his mission and be trained as a dragon rider, to do so he must journey to Ellesméra, the elven capital city located in the forest Du Weldenvarden, on the northern portion of Alagaësia. Before he leaves,Eragon must attend the funeral for the fallen leader of the Varden, Ajihad. Ajihad is ambushed and killed, with Murtagh while Ajihad's other guards are assumed dead. At his funeral, Ajihad's daughter Nasuada is elected to command the Varden. Eragon travels to Ellesméra where he meets Oromis and his dragon Glaedr, the only dragon and Rider secretly alive besides the Eragon and Saphira and Galbatorix. Oromis and Glaedr, however, are both crippled, and so cannot fight Galbatorix and must hide instead to avoid Galbatorix hunting them down. Eragon and Saphira are taught the use of logic, magic theory, scholarship, and combat, among other things.

Back in Farthen Dûr, Nasuada chooses to move the Varden from Tronjheim to Surda, to mount an attack on the Empire. The Varden suffers financial troubles, so Nasuada decides to fund the Varden and the war with Lace. The lace is magically produced and they can sell it cheap. One night when Nasuada is in her room, Elva saves her from an assassination attempt. Elva is the child which Eragon and Saphira blessed, the problem is that this was before Eragon was adept at the ancient language used in magic and accidentally curses her to BE a shield rather than TO BE shielded. Elva locates the assailant, who is killed after unwillingly surrendering information to Varden magicians about a subversive group based in Surda called the Black Hand, who is plotting to kill Nasuada. Nasuada later attends a meeting with key figures in Surda's government to discuss a potential upcoming battle against the Empire. They learn that the conflict is coming sooner than they initially suspected, and mobilize forces to attack, as well as sending for help from the dwarves.

Eragon continues his training, but is discouraged when the scar on his back, caused by the Shade he killed, causes him to have seizures. At the ancient elven ceremony, the Agaetí Blödhren, Eragon is altered by a spectral dragon. The changes alter his senses, and enhance his abilities, as well as healing all of his wounds. Reinvigorated, Eragon continues training until he learns that the Empire will soon attack the Varden in Surda. He leaves without completing his training, to aid the Varden in battle, much like Luke Skywalker left Yoda before his training was finished. I just found this a very neat similarity.

Meanwhile, Roran, Eragon's cousin, is hunted by the Ra'zac in Carvahall. He eventually persuades the entire village to attack the Ra'zac in the night, and succeeds in driving them off. After more conflicts with the village, the Ra'zac manage to kidnap Katrina, Roran's fiancée. Roran then stirs the village to mobilize, departing on a journey to join the Varden in Surda. He leads them to Narda, and then by sea to Teirm. In Teirm, they meet Jeod, who helps them pirate a new vessel from Teirm. Pursued by sloops from the Empire, the vessel manages to escape through a whirlpool, and eventually makes it to Surda, arriving just as the Battle of the Burning Plains is about to begin between Surda and its allies, and the Empire.

When conflict begins, Eragon is able to repel the opposing army using magic. Eventually, a Dragon Rider appears in favor of the Empire. The hostile Dragon Rider kills the dwarf king Hrothgar, and soon begins to fight with Eragon. The Dragon Rider is soon unmasked by Eragon and is revealed to be Murtagh. Murtagh tells Eragon that he was kidnapped and forced into loyalty by Galbatorix after a dragon hatched for him. Murtagh outmatches Eragon, but shows mercy due to their old friendship. Before leaving, Murtagh reveals that Eragon is his brother, and takes Eragon's sword as well. Ultimately, Galbatorix's army is forced to retreat after the arrival of the dwarves and the departure of Murtagh and Thorn. In the end, Eragon and Roran decide that they will seek out Katrina together.

Lots of adventure, lots of excitement all very well portrayed and with some magical storytelling that will suck you into this alternate world.

"Death Masks - Book 5 of the Dresden Files" by Jim Butcher (published 2003)

So, you're upset that the series about the Wizard named Harry is over. Well actually it isn't. Okay so this Harry's last name is Dresden, he lives in Chicago and he advertises that he is a "Wizard for Hire," but hey, he is a wizard. Oh yeah, he also has attitude. In his series "The Dresden Files," Jim Butcher has created not only a great character in Harry Dresden, but he has also reinvented the mythic and magical. In earlier books we learned their are different types of werewolves and the faery world is not so friendly.

In this book 5 of the series we join Harry, once again, in the middle of life:

Harry Dresden, Chicago's only practicing professional wizard, should be happy that business is pretty good for a change. But now he's getting more than he bargained for.
A duel with the Red Court of Vampires' champion, who must kill Harry to end the war between vampires and wizards...
Professional hit men using Harry for target practice.
Harry gets hired to find the missing Shroud of Turin.
A handless and headless corpse the Chicago police need identified and it seems only Harry could do it.
Not to mention the return of Harry's ex-girlfriend Susan, who's still struggling with her semivampiric nature. And who seems to have a new man in her life.
Some days, it just doesn't pay to get out of bed. No matter how much you're charging.

So it's Harry's life but with all that action it ain't boring.

The book starts off with Harry appearing on a "Jerry Springer" type TV show (hey it's Chicago), he only agrees to the appearance because another magical person needs to pass a message to Harry, but cannot afford to risk being seen with Harry. After all Harry did start the war between the Red Court Vampires and White Council Wizards. On the show are not only 2 representatives of the magical realm but 2 people to ridicule magic. One is a Catholic Priest and the other...well it turns out to be a major player from the Vampire's Red Court.

These other two "guests" also have something for Harry. After Harry's magical aura destroys the studio equipment, a hazard with Harry being a wizard; electronics quit around him, the vampire challenges Harry a duel to the death. This duel will end the war and all threats of violence against Harry's friends and family. The priest is there to hire Harry to find the recently stolen Shroud of Turin. After telling the vampire he'll think about it, Harry and the priest leave the studio only to be confronted by Chicago's head of the crime syndicate, Gentleman Johnny Marcone's hit-men.

The men shoot at Harry and he and the priest barely escape with their lives in Harry's beaten down VW Beetle. And this is only the first chapter. The action continues and never stops throughout this fifth edition of "The Dresden Files." Harry later teams up with the Knights of the Cross to fight the ultimate demons "Denarians," fallen angels that can manifest on earth.

What leads to an ultimate battle and some great fun. All throughout this book we are constantly treated to Harry's great wit and sarcasm. Do yourself a favor and start reading this series now.